Wednesday, November 7, 2012

HW Blog - "How To Write About..."

For this assignment write a short, sarcastic essay to parody the Single Story of some group you belong to.  Title your piece, "How to Write About..."

Write 3 short paragraphs that emphasize some of the stereotypes of the people being described.

 Due by 8:10 AM Friday, November 9, published to blog
Worth 4 classwork points

For example:

How To Write About An English Teacher

Use key words like "bookish," "nerdy," "stuffy," "pretentious," and "awkward."  English teachers are all insecure and self-conscious.  Their personalities reflect an over-intellectual attitude that borders on arrogance.  They like to use big words, mostly just to impress their friends - the few that they have.  The love proper grammar and jump at the chance to correct your mistakes.

Be sure to highlight the old-fashioned way they look.  Tweed is a must and probably cardigan sweaters and wool - slacks for men, skirts for women.   Black turtlenecks are a must, for when they go to the coffee shop to read poetry.  The men have conservative, short-cropped hairstyles, with the occasional longhair, counterculture, ponytail type mixed in.  Women have straight, unremarkable hairstyles, often pulled into a ponytail or bun.  If they wear make-up, it's minimal, and you'll find a smear of lipstick on a front tooth.

The most exciting thing in an English teacher's life is to talk about Shakespeare or any other boring old, dead, white guy - Hemingway or Steinbeck.  If you really want to get on their good side, talk about a British author and use words like "mood," "tone," symbolic," "allegory."  Extra points if you prefer the book version better than the movie version.  Whole evenings can be spent complaining about the attention span or unsophisticated interests of the students.   Video games and YouTube are equal to the devil.